Who do you think you are?
I’m the next criminal mastermind.
I’m afraid you need to be as intelligent as “Artemis Fowl” to understand and keep up with this movie. What a confusing chaos this was. I get it that they are looking for a sort of Harry Potter successor and already started drooling while thinking of the box-office with every new sequel. But they should have spread this single movie over a number of sequels because now you cannot make heads or tails of it. Let me remind you that I don’t know the book series written by Eoin Colfer, on which this film is based. Let alone read one of them. A kind of introduction of the characters would have been helpful for the uninitiated viewers. And that’s a big difference when you compare (and there will be a lot of comparisons) this Disney film with the Harry Potter films. Even if you hadn’t read one of the Harry Potter books, you were sucked into the wonderful story about this mini wizard from the start. All the leading protagonists were carefully introduced and gradually you got to know them, appreciate them, and quickly one of the leading characters became your favorite. With “Artemis Fowl” you better keep focused because before you know it you have missed a whole storyline and a number of important characters. The amount of facts and things of importance is so immense that it’ll make you dizzy.
The making of “Artemis Fowl” on its own deserves a motion picture.
It also took an awful lot of effort before the film could be released. The film rights were bought in 2001 by Miramax Films (in the middle of the fantasy film period when Potter and Frodo ruled). Next Disney announced in 2013 that they were going to make the film in partnership with The Weinstein Company. The creation of this feature film was very different from what had been expected. First of all, you had the disappearing trick of some directors. Then there was the Weinstein affair with Harvey waving his wand too much apparently. Next came the disgruntled fans and last but not least the Coronavirus. In the end, it was decided to stream the film on the Disney + platform instead of screening in the cinema. For sure this was the best decision they could have ever made. No one would be inclined to watch it in the cinema after reading a few reviews. Unfortunately, the revenue from Disney + platform subscriptions is not enough to bear the price tag of a sloppy $ 125 million.
The acting wasn’t impressive.
What else went wrong besides the fact it’s a very confusing story? Well, to be honest, I wasn’t really charmed by the characters themselves. Artemis Fowl Jr. (Ferdia Shaw) is an annoying kid without any charisma and totally insensitive (A kind of MIB version of Richie Rich). A deadly serious little brat with an attitude. Admittedly, his intelligence is lightyears beyond normal and he obtained a series of diplomas at a very young age. Plus he comes from a wealthy family and probably took everything for granted during his young life. The magic of a film doesn’t only depend on the magic of the story itself, but also how amiable the main characters come across. No one could resist the charms of Harry Potter (I know. There’s the comparison again.): that poor little fellow living under the stairs, with his roguish smile and lightning bolt on his forehead. I really didn’t find Artemis that charming. And even the more famous actors made little impression. Colin Farrell had a depressed and sulky expression throughout the film as if he already saw the potential for disaster. Judi Dench was actually the only one to stand out in her green leather fairy outfit. But that was more because of the charismatic nature of her character Commandant Root. And Lara McDonell looked adorable as the brave fairy Holly Short. You also had a centaur who could join Milli Vanilli. The dwarf Mulch Diggums (Josh Gad), who also took on the role of narrator at the same time, who’s actually not a dwarf and resembles Rubeus Hagrid. And there was even the suggestion David Bowie was an elf (Talking bout humor). That’s about it what I can remember from all personages. In general, however, the performances were not impressive or grand.
There’s also something to be said about the footage. They’ve put a lot of energy into it (maybe a little too much) and the film is packed with generally good-looking CGI. But a film about fairies, trolls, and dwarfs, who live in an underground hidden world, must look fairy-like and enchanting to me. They’ve decided to create a futuristic-looking fairy world full of flashy vehicles and modern buildings. And stuffed with a bunch of extras, busy decors, and an infinite number of props that you’ll need an extra pair of eyes to take in all the wonders. But don’t panic. This magical place is soon abandoned. Most of the film is set in the residence of the Fowl family. And there you can expect even more CGI (slightly less well developed). Perhaps it was quite an exaggeration when you consider the number of special effects. The only thing that impressed me was the jaw joints of Mulch Diggums.
No sequel needed for me.
No, I’m not a new fan of “Artemis Fowl” and I don’t feel the urge to discover the books. All in all, I found this movie version confusing and chaotic. I sometimes had the feeling that I was watching a new episode of “Kingsman” for young viewers. I didn’t fully understand the principle of the time bubble and was amazed bout how Artemis could unravel everything so quickly (But yes, extremely intelligent. Right?). Maybe me being a grownup has something to do with it. I guess youngsters will like it. Although, I think my two kids, who aren’t real book readers and never heard of Artemis Fowl, will be lost after 20 minutes. A re-watch might help better understanding the whole thing. I imagine fans of the books were very curious how Fowl’s world would look like on the silver screen. Anyway. I won’t wait for the sequels of this vague film. To put it mildly, I think the movie “Artemis Fowl” is a perfect fit for the current summer vacation that has become a disaster due to COVID-19.
My rating 3/10
The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent Review | A Meta Lucid-Trip
Nicholas Cage stars as Nick Cage in the action-comedy The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent. Creatively unfulfilled and facing financial ruin, the fictionalised version of Cage must accept a $1 Million offer to attend the birthday of a dangerous superfan (Pedro Pascal). Things take a wildly unexpected turn when Cage is recruited by a CIA operative (Tiffany Haddish) and forced to live up to his own legend, channelling his most iconic and beloved on-screen characters in order to save himself and his loved ones. With a career built for this very moment, the seminal award-winning actor must take on the role of a lifetime: Nick Cage.
From filmmakers, Tom Gormican and Kevin Etten, The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent is a sincere, authentic, and hilarious love letter to Nicholas Cage. It’s also an absolute hoot and delightfully bonkers as we take a rollercoaster ride through his iconic filmography. Full of quirky and heartfelt moments, the film showcases the most uncaged performance from the man himself as, after all, it’s the role he was born to play.
Nicholas Cage is nothing less than a screen legend whose iconic pictures include The Rock, Face/Off, Con Air, Moonstruck, Honeymoon in Vegas, and Academy Awarding winning turn in Leaving Las Vegas. The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent builds upon that renowned work and twists and turns it with an imagined “Nick Cage”. He’s able to do any genre from romantic comedies, avant-garde films like Mandy and Wild at Heart, and big tentpole franchises such as National Treasure.
The film is a homage to his body of work and the genres that he’s worked in. He’s a man known for taking risks early in his career that paid off handsomely but in the later years, he’s taken to independent film work some heading straight to streaming. Mandy, Joe, Prisoners of Ghostland and Pig are among my favourites. Each is interesting ranging from unusual to insane.
In the movie “Nick Cage” is a fictionalised version of the star, imagined as a once-highly respected actor who has fallen on hard times and is craving a return to box office glory and prestige. But his waning career is only one of his problems. The faux Cage’s megalomania has poisoned his relationships with his ex-wife Olivia (Sharon Horgan) and daughter Addy (Lily Sheen), unfortunately, though he can’t see it as the fictional Cage is feeling unfulfilled and rejected. This is in contrast with the real Nicholas Cage who recently received his best reviews for his performance in Pig
Nick becomes frustrated and a little unhinged, when he loses out on a role that he’s desperate to inhabit so when his smarmy agent played by Neil Patrick Harris extends him a lifeline with an offer to attend a birthday party for a cool payday of one million dollars, Nick despite his instincts reluctantly agrees, and hops on a plane to meet the birthday boy/ cage superfan in picturesque Mallorca, Spain.
Upon arriving in Mallorca and being greeted personally by Javi, Nick is completely checked out until he discovers that he and his host have much in common and begin to bond. Both are cinephiles and share a love of everything from The Cabinet of Dr Caligari to Paddington 2.
That’s not all they have in common. The wealthy man is just as neurotic as his guest of honour and they both find themselves looking for inspiration from the actor’s famously bold audacious characters.
The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent is an intriguing change of pace for Pascal, he inhabits the role of Javi, but as neurotic as he is the character turns out to be an international arms dealer and crime boss. Both Cage and Pascal have incredible chemistry together and truly form a bromance. They are so much fun together and unapologetic about their shared admiration. It is infectious.
The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent was such a hoot & delightfully BONKERS!! a rollercoaster ride through Cage’s iconic filmography & full of quirky & heartfelt moments The most uncaged performance was suave in this meta lucid trip.
Sonic the Hedgehog 2: Review | A Nostalgic Next-Level Adventure
The world’s favourite blue hedgehog is back for a next-level adventure in Sonic The Hedgehog 2. After settling in Green Hills, Sonic is eager to prove he has what it takes to be a true hero. His test comes when Dr Robotnik returns, this time with a new partner, Knuckles, in search of an emerald that has the power to destroy civilizations. Sonic teams up with his sidekick, Tails, and together they embark on a globe-trotting journey to find the emerald before it falls into the wrong hands.
The first Sonic movie only opened in February of 2020, and it turned out to be far better than expected and a faithful video-game adaptation. The Blue Blur raced towards a box office record when the pandemic hit. But fast forward two years, and we already have a sequel. A sequel in fact that is bigger and bolder, takes every endearing aspect of the original and cranks it up to the next level which makes it a worthy successor.
Previously Jim Carrey’s Dr Robotnik vowed revenge after being banished to the Mushroom Planet, while high-flying fox Tails (Colleen O’Shaughnessey) appears through a ring portal above Sonic’s new home of Green Hills. The first film also began with baby Sonic, back in his universe, being hunted by a tribe of Echidnas, which felt like a hint that red-fisted Knuckles wasn’t far behind. Sonic The Hedgehog 2 showcases these previous events and has taken the foundation laid from Sega’s second Sonic game from 1992. The 16-bit platform sequel showcased a newly revamped Sonic with new controls and a two-tailed fox friend that aids him. With the new upgrades also came more threats from Sonic’s nemesis evil Dr Robotnik, who is once again planning world domination. Paramount’s sequel expands the story of the platform game and delivers a nostalgic themed ride with laugh-out-loud moments and valuable life lessons.
The first movie was all about Sonic finding his place in a lonely world, while the sequel uses these life lessons by challenging the titular character to slow down and think of others. Having found a home and family we find Sonic restless for adventure. Tom (James Marsden) his adopted father figure helps to guide this blue justice (trademark pending) urging him to be more responsible after his short-lived stint as a vigilante.
Sonic is still the sarcastic and absurdly obsessed with contemporary pop culture Hedgehog we know and love. Voiced once again brilliantly by Ben Schwartz, he imbues an energetic childlike performance. Much like a child-friendly version of Deadpool, Sonic cracks jokes about Vin Diesel and busts some moves to some old-school classic hip-hop.
The additions of Tails (Colleen O’Shaughnessey) and Knuckles (Idris Elba) was a welcoming one as they inject a surprising amount of humour and heart into the story and feel like faithful live-action adaptations as you would expect from their game appearances. Tails is the brains of the trio, with his gadgets and smarts are made use of during many of the action sequences. Tails is a young, anthropomorphic fox cub with two distinct tails, which allow him to fly. He idolises Sonic as a hero and ring portals into Green Hills having tracked Sonic and takes off to find him, hoping that he’s not too late. Watching the pair’s friendship develop on-screen was adorable, there are genuinely sweet moments between these two.
O’Shaughnessey is the one voice cast member from the sonic games to reprise her role for the film. She’s spent eight years voicing Tails and has an endearing understanding of Sonic’s best friend.
Elba channels the little red wrecking ball with deadpan humour which contrasts Sonic’s speedy energetic snark. An anthropomorphic red Echidna warrior with super-strength is the sole survivor of his tribe after they were wiped out. His entire existence is about honour and being a warrior, describing him as a force of nature who collaborates with Robotnik to find the master emerald and defeat Sonic. The chemistry between the three main video game characters is a genuine highlight.
Jim Carrey is diabolical and even more unhinged in the sequel, he delivers one of his most over-the-top performances and fully embraces his respective role with exaggerated deliveries and elastic slapstick humour only he can provide. When teamed up with Knuckles this creates a juxtaposition between brains and brawn and with the return of Latte loving Agent Stone (Lee Majdoub) creates entertaining sequences and dialogue scenarios that are hilarious for children and adults alike.
With a speedy pacing, dance number, and a Hawaiian subplot featuring characters and arcs outside the main storyline, the movie tends to exert itself but made up for it with a bridezilla rampage and an escape sequence. The story picks up the speed with the CGI characters as Sonic and Tails embark on an adventure to retrieve the emerald before Robotnik can get his hands on it. Along the way, we’re treated to high-octane action sequences, easter eggs, and plenty of gags. The sequel takes them on a globe-trotting journey through an exhilarating snowboarding sequence and many familiar moments featured in the game, seeing the Tornado biplane brought to life truly put a smile on my face. The scope and scale of the sequel are immense as we portal across the globe to hot, cold, and hostile environments.
Sonic the Hedgehog 2 is a more confident sequel and a more enjoyable family film, that delivers heart and authenticity for fans of the game. With elements that set up a third entry, I can’t wait to see what’s next in the franchise as it expands with a mid-credits sequence and an already-confirmed streaming show on Paramount Plus starring Knuckles. The Sonic Cinematic Universe is a franchise I can’t wait to see grow, with decades of characters to appear, it’s gonna be an exciting time, especially since Sonic the Hedgehog is celebrating his 30th Anniversary.
Paramount Drops New Character Posters For The Lost City
With just twenty-four days until The Lost City drops in cinemas in America and 13th of April in the UK Paramount Pictures has kicked into gear their promotional material as earlier this afternoon they dropped brand new character posters for the film along with early tickets for Fandango Early Access screenings.
Official Synopsis for the film reads:
Brilliant, but reclusive author Loretta Sage (Sandra Bullock) has spent her career writing about exotic places in her popular romance-adventure novels featuring handsome cover model Alan (Channing Tatum), who has dedicated his life to embodying the hero character, “Dash.” While on tour promoting her new book with Alan, Loretta is kidnapped by an eccentric billionaire (Daniel Radcliffe) who hopes that she can lead him to the ancient lost city’s treasure from her latest story. Wanting to prove that he can be a hero in real life and not just on the pages of her books, Alan sets off to rescue her. Thrust into an epic jungle adventure, the unlikely pair will need to work together to survive the elements and find the ancient treasure before it’s lost forever.
The new character posters showcase the main cast of The Lost City Surrounded by the jungle and the concept is truly creative as it toys with the idea of Bullock’s character’s book of fiction becoming a reality. the Tagline’s for example Bullock’s character Loretta is “not a real adventurer”, Tatum’s character is “not a real hero”. Following the trend, Radcliffe’s character is “not a real evil genius. There are also character posters for Da’Vine Joy Randolph, Patti Harrison, and Oscar Nuñez.
The Lost City is directed by Adam Nee and Aaron Nee, with a screenplay by Oren Uziel, Dana Fox and the Nee brothers, based on a story by Seth Gordon. Liza Chasin, Sandra Bullock, and Seth Gordon all serve as producers, alongside executive producers JJ Hook, Dana Fox, Julia Gunn, and Margaret Chernin.
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