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HORROR

Little Monsters: “It Was Like A School Project In Which The Creatures Were Played By Fellow Students”

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Can we play the shooty game,Uncle David?
I don’t want us to get in trouble, Felix.
We’ll have to play it with the sound off.

 

Well, there’s always the award “Disappointment of the year”. I’m afraid this year the film “Little Monsters” will take the credits for this. I had regained confidence in the combination of horror and comedy after watching “Monster Party” and “The dead don’t die“. I’ve always had a problem with it when moviemakers mix these two genres. But these last two films managed to rekindle my enthusiasm. Well, “Little Monsters” has nipped that enthusiasm in the bud. There were some highlights in this zombie movie. But overall, I was plagued by a yawning attack and I was constantly annoyed about certain situations.

 

Little Monsters

 

Not my kind of humor.

I do understand that all kinds of new perspectives have to be devised nowadays to make the zombie genre even more interesting. In “The dead don’t die” they largely succeeded in that. But that’s personal taste. Coincidentally this film used the type of humor that I like the most. In “Little Monsters” the humor was generally absent. The absurdist tone of “The dead don’t die” was traded for flat and childish humor. Believe me, the amount of irritation exceeded the allowable level several times. After 2 minutes I was already annoyed by the opening scene where Dave (Alexander England) and his girlfriend constantly yelled at each other. Just like their friends, I felt ashamed on their behalf. And that wasn’t the only time while watching this film.

 

Little Monsters

 

Lupita dazzles.

First, let me list the most positive aspects. Without a doubt, there’s first and foremost the presence of Lupita Nyong’o. This Oscar winner moved me in “12 Years a slave“. And played a hair-raising role in the movie “Us“. In this movie, she’s such a ray of sunlight with that dazzling yellow dress. Probably strategically chosen so it contrasts sharply with the splattered blood. And with her ukulele and catchy version of Taylor Swift’s “Shake it Off“, it seemed like I was looking at a modern Maria from “The Sound of Music“. Certainly when the entire classroom joins her with the song like a real Von Trapp family. But apart from the fact that she’s very musical and fashion-conscious in this film, you also have to admit that Lupita is simply a beautiful woman. Even if she opens her mouth in a panic and produces an uncontrolled scream with her eyes wide open, she’s still adorable. And she’s actually the funniest one in the film.

 

Little Monsters

 

Dave. An annoying big kid.

To a lesser extent, I also thought Alexander England was pretty good. This irresponsible, sometimes imbecile klutz, is quite annoying at times. But nonetheless, due to his clumsy attitude and behavior (mainly in terms of social skills), he still manages to arouse some sympathy. I found his encounter with Miss Caroline quite endearing. That suddenly emerging urge to seduce this teacher. But then, in the next scene, you see him giving a demonstration of solo sex on the toilet while drooling over a class photo (with school teacher Carolina in it of course) of his nephew Felix (Diesel La Torraca). Would I be a teenager, I would chuckle about this. Now a raised eyebrow was the only result.

 

Little Monsters

 

It’s a zom-com.

This would-be-creepy zom-com also had its charms. The clumsy way in which Dave tries to impress Miss Caroline is quite funny to see. And of course, eventually, she gives in, even though she hates Dave from the start because of his brutal and stupid remarks. And finally, there are a few very funny moments such as the Darth Vader scene and the horde of singing zombies. I got the most spontaneous smile on my face when I saw a bewildered zombie attempting to clap to the rhythm and he found out that both his arms were missing. And here and there there was a pretty good joke or one-liner.

 

Little Monsters

 

A lot of irritating stuff.

But still. Unfortunately, the number of irritating things was overwhelming. I was relieved when this zom-com ended. First of all, I thought the zombies were extremely ridiculous. It was like a school project in which the creatures were played by fellow students. A Wednesday afternoon activity that involves a lot of fun. You can’t call it a horror, in my opinion, because of the lack of tension. The most bloody scenes always take place off-screen. This is probably due to the budget. Perhaps the much-used photo with Lupita covered in blood and those anxious-looking children in the background, raised wrong expectations for me. And as I mentioned before, the humor was missing. But mainly I was annoyed by the figure of Teddy McGiggle (Josh Gad). Such an annoying character. If I could, I would have personally fed him to those bloodthirsty undead. I know it’s an Australian indie. But to be honest, it looked really cheap (literally as figuratively). The only question I had was: “What’s a famous, talented Hollywood star like Lupita doing in this movie?“.

 

My rating 4/10
Links: IMDB

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HORROR

Prey | 20th Century Studios | Hulu

The origin story of the Predator in the world of the Comanche Nation 300 years ago. Naru, a skilled female warrior, fights to protect her tribe against one of the first highly-evolved Predators to land on Earth.

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Genre:

Action, Drama, Horror

Release Date:

20222 (Hulu)

Director:

Dan Trachtenberg

Cast:

Amber Midthunder, Dane DiLiegro, Stefany Mathias

Plot Summary:

The origin story of the Predator in the world of the Comanche Nation 300 years ago. Naru, a skilled female warrior, fights to protect her tribe against one of the first highly-evolved Predators to land on Earth.

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HORROR

Choose or Die – A Miss For Netflix

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Netflix’s home page suggestions can always be hit or miss, and unfortunately its latest release ‘Choose or Die’ falls into the category of the latter. Captivated by Asa Butterfield on the poster, I was curious to see what this film had to offer and begrudgingly it didn’t have a lot.

We follow Kayla, a broke student who has a lot to deal with in terms of her family situation and being the sole provider for herself and her mum. She then stumbles upon a retro video game from the 80s which forces her to choose and ultimately leads to various chain reactions of horrific events involving people close to her.

Lola Evans as Kayla and Asa Butterfield as Isaac

The premise of the film sounds interesting, however, I think it swings and misses quite early into the film’s first act. Eddie Marsan sets the tone and trail of interest for Choose or Die as we are introduced to this sadistic game and the chain of events it will inevitably pursue. 

Choose or Die doesn’t make it easy to empathise with its characters, finding any connection to Kayla or Isaac was difficult. This ‘are they aren’t they’ subplot lingers throughout the film’s narrative but adds nothing to the overarching story. The supporting characters, such as Thea and Laura, are much more interesting and genuinely have you intrigued as to what decisions they will make.

What stood out to me was the violent and gore-like scenes of 80s horrors, with some pretty good stomach churning special effects make-up. Those intense scenes, one involving a rat, had me genuinely glued to the screen, anticipating what may happen next. Choose or Die’s strongest component are the early moral decisions Kayla has to make and ultimately demonstrate Meakin’s passion for the horror genre.

Ioanna Kimbook as Grace in Choose or Die, seen here in the diner in one of the more grotesque decisive moments for Kayla

The way in which this film is shot, felt very “student-esque” with its lackluster camera movements and setting. The set design lacked little depth, except for Isaac’s room which is full of detail, therefore making the world feel small and less three dimensional. An element which pulled me out of this cinematic experience, was the fact that this was evidently filmed in the United Kingdom, and the cast contained predominantly a lot of British actors doing an American accent so I wasn’t fully immersed into this world. 

Meakins clearly uses his passion for the horror genre to influence this film’s dark tone, from it’s leading characters’ moral compass as well as the gorey visuals that inevitably come with those decisions. The whole world feels cold and derelict, be it the place in which Kayla cleans or the housing estate of which she lives in, this is an unwelcoming world that no-one wants to comfort you in. 

Choose or Die isn’t a film that will stick out as one that defined 2022, however I’m sure someone will take something away from this film, be it’s reference to 80s gaming or the violent and graphic elements that the director is clearly passionate about. 

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HORROR

Off Season – To Premiere Exclusively on Shudder

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Shudder, AMC Networks’ premium streaming service for horror, thriller and the supernatural, announced that OFFSEASON will be available exclusively to stream on the platform starting on Friday, June 10, 2022. As a Shudder exclusive, the platform will be the only subscription service that will carry the film in the U.S., Canada, the United Kingdom, Ireland, Australia and New Zealand.

Upon receiving a mysterious letter that her mother’s gravesite has been vandalized, in OFFSEASON, Marie (Donahue) quickly returns to the isolated offshore island where her late mother is buried. When she arrives, she discovers that the island is closing for the offseason with the bridges raised until Spring, leaving her stranded. One strange interaction with the local townspeople after another, Marie soon realizes that something is not quite right in this small town. She must unveil the mystery behind her mother’s troubled past in order to make it out alive.

Check out the film’s trailer below and read our review HERE as it debuted during SXSW 2021

Written and directed by Mickey Keating (Psychopaths), OFFSEASON stars Jocelin Donahue (Doctor Sleep), Joe Swanberg (The Rental, “Easy”), Richard Brake (3 From HellMandy), Melora Walters (The Pale Door, “Pen15”) and Jeremy Gardner (After MidnightThe Mind’s Eye).

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